"Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Are Getting a Divorce" Divorce Cake

or First Date Cake, if you prefer.

June 29, 2012 3:30 PM EDT | By Anthony Smith
Date cake
A delicious First Date Divorce Cake to not share with your ex. (Photo: Creative Commons)

Divorce is a time for celebration. Not only do you get a queen-sized bed to yourself, but you're single, too! Stop crying and start preheating your oven. In honor of our favorite celebrity divorce since Kramer vs. Kramer, we're going to show you how to make the best darn Divorce Cake ever. You'll have no one's face to shove this into but your own. 

One bite of this toffee-cream covered cake, and you'll want 'full custardy' of the whole thing!

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"Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Are Divorced" Divorce Cake

(also called a "First Date" Date Cake)

1. Get ready to bake.

Grab a handful of dates (and we're not talking about the ones from OKCupid LOL!) and chop them up. Put them in a bowl and add boiling water and a hefty pinch of baking soda to it until it's nice and soft. Drain them and roll them in a little brown sugar and a mix of equal parts apple cider vinegar and water.

Get a package of yellow cake mix and prepare according to the directions. Add the dates to it. Put it in your cake pan. Into the cake pan, add a bride/groom/gender-neutral figurine, depending. If you're Katie Holmes, buy one of the Top Gun action figures off of Ebay and use that. Bake.

2. Prepare your Toffee Sauce.

Heat in a pan until it melts: two tablespoons of butter, a cup of brown sugar, one-third cup of heavy cream or custard, 1/4th teaspoon of vanilla extract, one tablespoon of rum.

Let it thicken.

3. Serve

Top the cake with the toffee sauce and serve to your friends. The lucky person who gets the figurine gets to make the next Divorce Cake!



 

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